Accepting Who We Are
Two of the most overwhelming challenges all creatures born human are faced with are identifying who we are, and then accepting who we are. Whether Owner, Master, slave or anyone else, the challenges are equally great. In this group we are relating only to those whose lives are defined by who they are, and the associated title they claim. An Owner always IS who someone is. There is no alternative. Masters and slaves might be equally born to BE either Master or slave. Or, Masters and slaves might be born to have their mastery or slavery as only one more thing that they do, just like being a carpenter or fireman. Either way, we either ARE our roles, or those roles are only what we do.
Owners, along with the Masters and slaves, potential Masters or slaves or those exploring their mastery or slavery, who belong to this group know somehow that these titles are more than a profession, a hobby, or just another characteristic of who we are.
The first challenge, of identifying who we are, is easy for some, and extremely difficult for others. Everyone comes to the self realization in their own unique way. Along the way, a lot of things seem true for awhile, but through exploring and the experiences gained, we let go of those old beliefs and move on to new beliefs and new self images. We all start with our egotistic self image and the beliefs that allow our ego's control.
We also start out with average descriptions of who we are. From the moment we understand a language we are taught what is expected of us. Those expectations are always within the very limited confines of acceptable human behavior. This is how we are controlled and socialized.
Here, among this group, we are exploring becoming extraordinary. All the arguments that apply to average human beings belong with discussions of average people. The movement to becoming spiritually mature involves relinquishing average human logic in deference to Divine logic.
We don’t define life. We can only discover life. When we quit trying to become what we’re not, often after exhaustion, we can accept who we are. That takes great courage, and sometimes great pain. It is never without cost.
As average citizens, if we enter a burning building to retrieve a fire victim we are considered heroes. Our egos love being heroes. That’s what the ego strives for. If, however, we claim ourselves to be a fireman, from qualifying to do so, we no longer have the option to go past anyone in a burning building. We are then doing the minimum expected if we go to extraordinary means to retrieve someone from a fire. We are disciplined, if not fired, in contempt, if we fail to do what would have been heroic for an average citizen, but what is only the fulfillment of minimum responsibility when titled “fireman”.
The courage to claim who we are is one of the greatest acts we will ever perform in our lifetime. We must overcome our natural cowardice when we claim the responsibility of who we are. We must permanently give up the opportunity to be considered heroic from the average egotistic perspective. We must give up being average and become unsung heroes. My grandmother used to say, “Anything we do that others know about, we shall never be credited with.”
When we recognize we are meant to lead or direct others’ lives, we are accepting a deep and moral responsibility. Every order we issue must carry with it moral responsibility for that order. A Master’s ego would rather His slave remain egotistically responsible because then the Master doesn’t need to. It’s cheap and easy to issue an order that we expect the receiver to remain responsible for accepting and obeying.
Courage is being qualified and willing to accept full responsibility for our orders. We are no more beneficial than a leather “hints from Heloise” without the associated responsibility. All the platitudes about human dignity and intelligence and rights make great prose, but are nothing more than excuses to use and abuse, to the extent that another will accept our commands. Everything remains “their fault” because it was made clear they must think for themselves.
Issuing orders that are refutable is what every two-year old does naturally. The child indiscriminately demands everything it wants and the parents’ agreement with the orders is what protects the child from receiving more than it should have. The child takes no responsibility for anything demanded. The child doesn’t need to, because the parents do.
Issuing irrefutable orders is what matters, what makes a difference and what requires timbre and character, courage and strength. No child is capable of taking responsibility, so the parents must. Anyone who claims to command others, however, must take adult responsibility and not demand that the receiving slave carry the responsibility for acceptance. Making demands on another who must carry the responsibility for what is demanded is no different than the act of a demanding child.
The evolutionary purpose of every One who takes real responsibility, regardless of their title, is to find moral certainty. That means knowing for sure what to do. Until we have moral certainty we are still conducting the demanding acts of a child. Moral certainty only comes from identifying, developing and maintaining a direct connection to the “source” of all intelligence. The nature of that intelligence can be viewed differently by each, but acceptance and connection with IT is the critical essence of moral certainty.
Slaves are created without the personal capacity for moral certainty. Their connection is through us. If we don’t have a morally certain connection, we can’t give a slave theirs. We can’t give what we don’t already have. If a slave is capable of finding its own moral certainty, then it has no business pretending to be a slave. Slaves are not weak creatures who seek a co-dependent life to avoid developing their own morally certain connection. Slaves are potentially the strongest creatures of all of us.
It is in slaves' nature to only find the connection that allows moral certainty through their destined Owners. That’s what draws them to us. If not for this reason, then we are only enabling some weakness or pathology that would be better cured through professional help.
Admittedly, moral certainty is an advanced human state. Most don’t even hope to achieve the connection required in their lifetimes. The invitation to this group touches the part of you that knows there is something more, something beyond what humans can understand egotistically.
Our challenge here, isn’t to maintain our human egotistic identification and pride, not to discourage others from going beyond being average, but to surrender to our adulthood. Our task is to passionately proclaim our search for obedience, which, when found, defines all spiritual adulthood.
There are men and women in this group who have paid heavy prices to know who they are and to become who they are. We can learn from what they have gone through. We can save effort by knowing what they used to believe before they found and accepted the Truth. These people deserve and have My respect, none more than slaves who also suffer the societal denigration of their titles.
There is a law of life that we cannot give away what we don’t have. Until we have self respect we can’t give it to others. Whenever we find it difficult to give respect, we must examine the deficit of self respect we find in our own lives. Naming as arrogant those who have the courage to claim their roles in life is such an average thing for the ego to do to justify not claiming one's own role in life. It is so much easier to maintain the chance to become heroic by claiming no title, thereby avoiding the responsibility that would come with such a claim.
Maslow told us that anything worth doing well is worth doing poorly until we learn how. None of us begins at “perfect”. We all take small, stumbling steps while we learn to do what is extraordinary. We are measured in life by whether we encourage and facilitate those steps or whether we mock and discourage them. That’s what being either a part of the problem or of the solution is all about.
Another law of life is that we are either growing or dying. In each moment we make decisions which determine which is happening. We have the collective potential here to become the most alive creatures on earth.
My thanks to all of you who are doing just that.